tagged !!

Personally i dont believe this concept of ideal girl ...i believe you have a girl and try to make ur relationship ideal...but honey u have me tagged there is no escaping, is there!!...

1. Great hair ...are always a turn on.... could be long ,could be short ...if it is curly i prefer it left unkempt,if it is staright ,i like it neat and well groomed...
2.Smile... ur never lasting smile can bring u near to me.!!
3. a bit of insanity,ridiculness is always the proof that some innocence is still preserved in her.... there does not exist logic for everything that is ..
4.understanding.... he he.. in my case an absolute necessity....
5.affectionate and caring.... sorry but i am a mama's boy
6. "putki", well yeah i like a cute ass..( i am very shy admitting it)...
7.Simply simple... i like simplicity in a girl..
8.should be able to laugh at my sick jokes... common i am inventing these for her in the first place..:)

Grrrrrrr.... mein apna badla jaroor loonga..u made me write all this..

my belle..

funny thing love is..... one moment ure writing urself a suicide note and next ure ready to write the saga of love.... well the suicide part is my minds working and the later part is my belle's...- her name is paro.... well i cud write endlessly abt her..... but for the time being ... i will restrict to the new meanings my life as got...... to begin ... i really have found so less people so much in love... apart from me :).... she walks this balance of life and love.....she has this natural quality of putting people at ease...she always makes friends where ever she goes...among the two of us she is more sacrificing... you know this stuff about relationships being full of compromises....and more often than not you have to be at the receiving end ...not paro...she does it so naturally... she has given up a lot for me....and i wonder if i ever will be able to match upto her standards....i am truly blessed by having her in my life there is so much to learn from her .... and about her optimism you have to see her, to believe her... not many people know about the hurdles this iron lady has crossed..... but never i have ever found her in despair..always smiling, facing life as it comes ......paro is a bundle of talent too...at the first instant u might be tempted to dismiss her as a mere fake coz she has none of the airs of a talented brat... but oh myh god...she is so talented...i personally like her voice...her renedition of pal is meliflous...and at the same time very strong that u would want to sing it with her too.... i was hooked to her when i first her sing it and havent seen back since then.... but that nots all... she is a great dancer ..great performer on stage be it skit,choregraphy...u name it ...she makes all this look so effortless.... paro has with me with the downs and ups of life...... more downs then ups...sometimes i wonder how can she tolerate a guy like me.... but like i said before thats paro for you.... comimg from a remote part of the world...she has made the people of her place to dream ...and to fulfill them.....i could go on and on and on...... which i will coz i am never tired of respecting this girl...i know there has been times when i never stood by you paro ..... that i could not really give you that shoulder ..... but god only knows how i feel... and i would call my life sucessful the day i will give you ur due regards... it will take a bit of time..coz unlike you i have my share of follies.....i am a mere mortal..... but i will get there ...to stand out respectful in ur eyes.... and to say the whole world that i love you and i respect you a lot !!!

when i lay down

When i lay down so many thought s cross my mind.....well in case one thinks what am i talking about its about relationships..... and mine in particular..... well i read somewhere that relationships are like being in a restaurant.... you want to order what the other guy orders ... this did not happen for me.... but yeah i definitely feel ...i dont wanna enter in any such restaurant.....
tricky situation this is.... coz humans are brought up with this propensity.. to seek company of someone.... male or female..... great except when u re at one of the receiving ends of it..... like i am.... and best part is it is no body's fault.... relationships do not have any definite rules.... u can never say who in the world can go famously without a speck..... if ask me i will come across as a coward..... who wants to run away.... well i have respect for my sanity.... i dont wanna loose it and loose it again..... i have lived thru the pain and a bit of pleasure of it alll.... but pain is too much deep excruciating agonizing pain....so much so that i begin to think ..why do i have to go thru it... well why wont u just go about effortlessly ....thru life.... actually i have this tendency ... to be too protective of my emotions....to the extent .... any deviation from th enormal sets my alarm ringing...... guess i am not meant for it..... it is the perogative of brave and mighty....well one school of thoght is ...relationships are a part of life...and one should be clear about it...... well the safety net again.... i am guilty here...... i go on and on..without realising the breaking stress...... thats the trick...like a friend of mine said once that keep your priorities clear and evrything falls into place... and i have seen people do that quite easily...... hey then if thats the trick why does not it come easily to me...... a conscious and more discilplined effort ...... a something called belief .... is important.... dude ... lets try it....

rest aftr this experimentation....

will do again !!

now this is my 4th attempt at blogging..... actually some complex phenomenon always prevents me from continuing it....like now...i simply dont feel like it....its not tht i dont have things to write about...for e.g. a bad hair day,memories, etc etc... even in my sleep i find myself talking to myself and feel a urgent need to let out but never happened...i cursed myself,on two occasions ,the guilt was reduced a bit since i had forgoten the password ....
i had a diary when i was in engg colllege... which i read 6 months back,when i thought of penning some thing,but the entries made me paranoid... the entries were more often then not like ..got at 8 ..took bath...had break fast blah blah blah ...and good night... i was scared i might start tat once over again... so kept the diary away from my sight forever..
Yeah coming to blog....everybody has some story to tell.. recently i got hold of some episodes of 'wonder years' , now that was a serial i grew up watching and when i saw it again.... i felt these american kids are fortunate.. most of them make home videos of themselves..... they have some way of connecting to themselves.... true we have all the photographs but they are limited...hence this decision to write a blog ...for posterity.... so it goes THY SHALL BLOG... good night